Sleep, Sweet Sleep

After a bad night's sleep, I was dragging all day yesterday. That coupled with neves made me want to crash the second I got home from work. I tried so hard to stay awake, I did. By 7:45PM I gave up. I knew that I was risking the dreaded midnight wake up but I just didn't care. I was dead asleep by 8pm and awoke at 7:30AM. I woke up probably at least two times during the night but didn't care to check the time or light outside. It was kind of nice! I definitely needed the sleep. If only my bed were as comfortable as the one above.

Sleep is important to learn about. Wikipedia can provide information!

The Postal Service has a little diddy about sleep. Here are the lyrics!

What does your sleeping position say about you? Huffington Post lets us all in! (I'm a semi-fetal)

"Hello, Lover"

Brittney and I took a bad turn into DSW shoe store yesterday. We were strictly there to check out shoes for HER but I fell in love with a pair that are absolutely exquisite. A piece of art, really.

(The link)

Did I buy them? No. I'm not crazy.
In no world of mine would these shoes be practical or useful. They are amazing though and make your legs looks pretty snazzy. If they ever go on super sale clearance 2010, I am on it.

Some others that make me swoon....


Someday I shall discuss my obsession and addiction to clutches. Vintage, new, shiny, matte, bold, understated.....all of 'em.

DiSC Communication Training

DiSC Dimensions of Behavior model describes behavioral patterns in terms of four tendencies:
Dominance
Influence
Steadiness
Conscientiousness

All people have four tendencies but in differing intensities. The relationship of the four tendencies to each other creates a profile pattern which can lead to information about a person’s potential behavioral responses.

Our office was given this evaluation and then during the workshop, we reviewed results and learned how to better communicate with each other. Because the environment was work, many of us thought the conclusions might be skewed depending on our work status, position, and experiences. I felt that these hit my nail right on the head, though. One of the creepiest but interesting things about this personality profile is that your name is used in the results. It won’t say “person” or “participant” but instead says “April has a tendency to…..” and it makes the results very personal; both the good and the bad results. Here are some of the highlights:

Motivated by:

Providing needed support to others through products or services

Having clearly defined areas of responsibility and authority

A harmonious, informal, friendly work environment

Being “right”

Environments where loyalty is rewarded with job security and where she can perform to her own standards

Demotivating factors:

There is chronic hostility with co-workers

She is repeatedly unable to perform at a level that meets her standards

She has insufficient control over resources, time and other people’s actions necessary to create a quality outcome

Support from bosses and/or co-workers is lacking

Behavioral strengths:

Accepting of other people’s ideas

Willing to extend herself to meet other people’s needs

Good at calming people who are upset

Analyzes situations or problems, weighing the pros and cons

Systematic in her approach to situations or activities

Tactful and diplomatic in her interactions with others

Uses subtle or indirect approaches to resolving conflict

Behavior in Conflict Situations:

May become more quiet and reserved

May become defensive

May attempt to calm agitated people

May withhold information

May attempt to overpower others with facts and logic

May use indirect aggression and/or passive resistance

Seeks to find solutions that are acceptable to everyone

Pretty interesting overall. Some of my co-workers love the workshop while others felt misrepresented. It was pretty funny to see who in our office (we have three organizations in one office area) got along and who were completely different but worked together well.

Elizabeth Gilbert Love

Here are my favorite parts of both "Eat, Pray, Love" and "Committed." These might be spoilers for some of you who haven't read the books or haven't finished yet so....beware.

“Eat, Pray, Love”

The Yogis say that Ham-sa is the most natural mantra, the one we are all given by God before birth. It is the sound of our own breath. Ham on the inhale, sa on the exhale. As long as we live, every time we breathe in or out, we are repeating this mantra. I am That. I am divine, I am with God, I am an expression of God. I am not separate, I am not alone, I am not this limited illusion of an individual. (Pg. 141-2)

Your problem is you don’t understand what the word means. People think a soul mate is your perfect fit, and that’s what everyone wants But a true soul mate is a mirror, the person who shows you everything that’s holding you back, the person who brings you to your own attention so you can change your life. A true soul mate is probably the most important person you’ll ever meet, because they tear down your walls and smack you awake. But to live with a soul mate forever? Nah. Too painful. Soul mates, they come into your life just to reveal another lay of yourself to you, and then they leave. And thank God for it. (Pg. 149)

I told her again this morning, “No, Wayan-I don’t need it. My heart’s been broken too many times.”

She said, “I Know a cure for a broken heart.” Authoritatively, and in a doctorly manner, Wayan ticked off on her fingers the six elements of her Fail-Proof Broken-Heart Curing Treatment: “Vitamin E, get much sleep, drink much water, travel to a place far away from the person you loved, meditate, and teach your heart that this is destiny.” (Pg. 264)

“Committed”

Compulsive comparing, of course, only leads to debilitating cases of what Nietzche called Lebensneid or “life envy”; the certainty that somebody else is much luckier than you, and that if only you had her body, her husband, her children, her job, everything would be easy and wonderful and happy. With certainty so difficult to achieve, everyone’s decisions become an indictment of everyone else’s decisions, and because there is no universal model anymore for what makes “a good man” or “a good woman,” one must almost earn a personal merit badge in emotional orientation and navigation in order to find one’s way through life anymore. (Pg. 46)

The Buddha taught that all human suffering is rooted in desire. Don’t we all know this to be true? Any of us who have ever desired something and then didn’t get it (or worse, got it and subsequently lost it) know full well that suffering of which the Buddha spoke. Desiring another person is perhaps the most risky endeavor of all. As soon as you want somebody-really want him-it is as though you have taken a surgical needle and sutured your happiness to the skin of that person, so that any separation will now cause you a lacerating injury. (Pg. 96)

Infatuation leads to what psychologists call “intrusive thinking”-that famously distracted state in which you cannot concentrate on anything other than the object of your obsession. Once infatuation strikes, all else-jobs, relationships, responsibilities, food, sleep, work-falls by the wayside as you nurse fantasies about your dearest one that quickly becomes repetitive, invasive, and all-consuming. Infatuation alters your brain chemistry, as though you were dousing yourself with opiates and stimulants. The brain scans and mood swings of an infatuated lover, scientists have recently discovered, look remarkably similar to the brain scans and mood swings of a cocaine addict-and not surprisingly, as it turns out, because infatuation is an addiction, with measurable chemical effects on the brain. (Pg. 99)

The Winding Down Clock

Discovered a new blog: Life of a Doctor's Wife

If you haven't heard of Operation Beautiful, you need to get on that.

I have approximately 5 blog entries that I want to post but with my crazy life lately, those are not going to be happening anytime soon. My goal is to get those done over the weekend while I also do the million other things on my to-do list. I have been dogsitting this week and although I adore them, they are exhausting! I have been able to walk twice a day and finished Chelsea Handler's My Horizontal Life: A Collection of One-Night Stands. One more book of her's to go and then I believe I will have completed her entire bibliography.

QuoteS of the Day

"Dwelling on the negative simply contributes to its power."
Shirley MacLaine

"Just living is not enough.
One must have sunshine, freedom, and a little flower."
Hans Christian Andersen

"If you want to be happy, be."
Leo Tolstoy

"Life is a shipwreck but we must not forget to sing in the lifeboats."
Voltaire

Free Will Astrology

For the week of June 15th:

"Thou shalt not kill" is a crucial rule for you to follow, and not just in the literal sense. According to my reading of the astrological omens, you should also be extra vigilant as you avoid more metaphorical kinds of destruction. Please be careful not to unleash ill-chosen words that would crush someone's spirit (including your own). Don't douse newly kindled fires, don't burn recently built bridges, and don't deprive fresh sprouts of the light they need to keep growing. To put this all in a more positive frame: It's time for you to engage in a reverent and boisterous celebration of life, nurturing and fostering and stimulating everywhere you go.

And I am so in the celebratory mind frame right now! I am squashing negativity as much as possible and trying to let things be and enjoy the people and things I have around me. Planning for the big trip also helps! I am down to 3 weeks....

Lyrics of the Day

Airplanes-B.O.B featuring Hayley Williams from Paramore

[Hayley Williams - Chorus]
Can we pretend that airplanes
In the night sky
Are like shooting stars
I could really use a wish right now
Wish right now, wish right now
Can we pretend that airplanes
In the night sky
Are like shooting stars
I could really use a wish right now
Wish right now, Wish right now

[B.o.B - Verse 1]
Yeah
I could use a dream or a genie or a wish
To go back to a place much simpler than this
'Cause after all the partyin'
The smashin' and crashin'
And all the glitz and the glam and the fashion
And all the pandemonium and all the madness
There comes a time when you fade to the blackness
And when you're starin' at that phone in yo' lap
And hopin', but them people never call you back
But that's just how the story unfolds
You get another hand
Soon after you fold
And when your plans unravel in the sand
What would you wish for if you had one chance?
So airplanes airplanes
Sorry I'm late
I'm on my way
So don't close that gate
If I don't make that
Then I switch my flight
And I'll be right back at it
By the end of the night

[Hayley Williams - Chorus]

[B.o.B - Verse 2]
Yeah
Yeah
Somebody take me back to the days
Before this was a job
Before I got paid
Before it ever mattered what I had in my bank
Yeah back when I was tryin' to get a tip at Subway
And back when I was rappin' for the hell of it
But now days we rappin' to stay relevant
I'm guessin' that if we can make some wishes out of airplanes
Then maybe oh maybe I'll go back to the days
Before the politics that we call the rap game
And back when ain't nobody listened to my mix tapes
And back before I tried to cover up my slate
But this is for Decatur
What's up Bobby Ray?
So can I get a wish to end the politics
And get back to the music that started this shit
So here I stand
And then again I say
I'm hopin' we can make some wishes outta airplanes

[Hayley Williams - Chorus]

Quote of the Day

"If you're too sweet and nice, they just leave tire tracks on your back."

- Gert "Mother" Boyle, Chairman of the Board, Columbia Sportswear Co., (1924 - )

Eat, Pray, Love

I do believe that this book will be my soul guide/spiritual leader as I dive in to my next adventure. I finally finished the book last night and have so much to say about it but don't have the energy to do so just yet. I have notes upon notes from both "Eat, Pray, Love" and "Committed" to go over but they need to make sense to other people than just myself. Work in progress.


I will say that it is perhaps fate that the movie comes out on August 13th the same day that I will arrive in Michigan and step foot into my little apartment for the first time. It is also FRIDAY the 13th, proven to be one of my historically lucky days (knock on wood). I plan to move my stuff in, shower, grab a fantastic lunch, and see the movie that night. I will have to actually find a movie theater but no worries. I also need to acquire a copy of EPL to refer back to often.

The Pill

This is a really interesting piece about "The Pill" on PBS.org.


Oh, the pill. I recently went back on the pill after a 10 month hiatus. My need for this amazing invention is not "fun" but more for health reasons. It does feel nice to be back on my routine (I thought I was always forgetting to do something the first few months I stopped) but I am not a fan of what my body is going through.

Typical side effects of the pill when starting are:
nausea
weight gain
headaches
cramping
breast tenderness

These can last for up to three months but my typical is a good solid month. I can handle most of this but one that they didn't mention is the PMS-like symptom of OHMYGODCRABBINESS. It does need to be in bold, big lettering. I have a mean case of the crabbies that I can't seem to shake. I have practiced my deep breathing and trying to focus on something else and, well, nothing seems to work that great. If I am giving myself pep talks in the car, I must be going bonkers.

I am hoping that all of these symptoms subside soon enough. At the very least, before I spend over a week in the car by myself. I prefer not to scare people as I drive through Utah and Nebraska yelling at myself and breathing deeply.

One of the main reasons I wanted to go back on the pill was for a few health concerns and to get my inner system back on track. Honestly, things haven't been quite normal since I moved back to the area. I have had a lot of stress so I thought that my body was just "out of whack" and I didn't think anything of it. Things improved once I got a job and even more when I started working out but now that I am in my last month, my schedule is becoming wonky again and although I will be more active, I am definitely neglecting myself completely. I will say that having health insurance has proven to be incredibly helpful.

T-Minus 30 Days

The one month countdown begins!

Free Will Astrology Horoscope

For the week of July 1st:

How well are you capitalizing on this year's unique opportunities, Aries? Since we're halfway through 2010, let's take an inventory. I'm hoping you're well underway in the heroic task of conquering your past. It has been and will continue to be prime time for you to wean yourself from unresolvable energy-drains. So exorcise irksome ghosts, please! Pay off ancient debts! Free yourself from memories that don't serve you! You're finally ready to graduate from lessons you've had to learn and re-learn and re-re-learn. The coming months will bring you

even more opportunities to finish up old business that has demanded too much of your time and energy.

(Click for source)

I do like to believe in horoscopes. I primarily read this one because it relates to things in my life much closer than I would expect. This one is a great example of that and also something that has been on my mind lately.

I have baggage. Everyone has baggage. That kind of emotional baggage that you carry around, day to day, and into and out of new relationships and experiences. It can effect how we see things and how we respond to the world around us.

In the last few days, I have been thinking a lot about all the baggage I have here and what I want to leave behind. I have heavy baggage that I have been carrying around for at least a decade now. It is always there popping up when I least expect it even but it is what it is. As I begin sorting things to move away, I am noticing just how much I am "running away" from and what I hope for the future. I have some really big aspirations as I move forward. I just hope I can accomplish them!

I am leaving people behind that I desperately need to leave. I am going to let go of my mistakes and failures since they aren't doing me any good now. I am going to take all of the wonderful things that I have learned here and the few people that have showed me what friendship is and move forward. All of the crappy people in my life have been my fault since I let them be there. I have allowed myself to get really lazy and treat myself like crap. Eh, that just has to stop sometime and why not now?

As I drive, I will roll down the windows, let the wind move through the car, air my grievances and heartbreaks one last time and leave them. Look out mid-west for low flying baggage!